What to Do to Overcome Breakup Trauma.

Relationships are like glass. Sometimes it’s better to leave them broken than hurt yourself trying to put it back together.”  I am at a phase in my life right now where I’m struggling with loneliness. It means that most of the time, I feel a deep sense of disconnection from the world around me and the people I share it with. My last post was "the best way to break up" with your partner if you are tired of the relationship but that post won't be complete without telling you how you can get over break up trauma.

Getting over break up is not an easy one even if the relationship wasn't what you wanted, at one point in time after break up you will still remember the good things you shared with your ex. "HELLO"!!! No relationship can be 100% bad.

Here're things you should do after break up

• Forgive and forget.

After the initial phase of shock and grief has passed, you’ll find yourself in a place where you can let things go and remain cool. After all, no one was to blame. Most relationships have a start and end date, and this just happened to be yours. Think of it this way: this person doesn't have the right to take up a section of your heart and mind. When you forgive them for their behavior and everything that happened, the forgetting will start. And that's okay. That's what relationships are like. You've had friendships that have faded, and you were fine. This'll fade, and you'll be fine then, too.

• Quit talking about your ex

One to three weeks after the incident is still an acceptable period of time to talk about the ex. But still, you shouldn’t make everything that comes out of your mouth be about your ex. Quit talking about whether he or she is better without you, how much happier he or she seems and how it feels like he or she is getting on with his or her life while you’re just plain stuck. I promise you, it will get annoying and friends will lose interest in talking to you. Remember that although talking about yourself makes you feel good, other people have needs to. Everyone wants to talk about themselves. Learn how to give way. Don’t make everything about YOU.

• Be with the people that will make you laugh

Maybe for a few days you’ll look glum and sullen. Maybe you’ll go to school or work with bloodshot eyes, pale skin and unkempt clothes. But when you get up, make sure to dress up! Moving on could be one of the hardest things you’ll ever have to endure, but you don’t have to look homeless on top of it. Laugh at yourself and pick yourself up. Make sure to spend time with the people who make you happy. Go with those who make you forget about all the bad things you’re experiencing. Having a good laugh has good effects for the body and Focus on being positive. Just because he/she broke up with you or doesn't want you back doesn't mean that you're worthless. There are plenty of other people who want you and would be willing to treat you even better than your ex. Find things that make you Smile and laugh.Surround yourself with friends and people who care. Not only will you feel better, your ex will notice how happy you are and maybe regret rejecting you.

• Keep busy. 

Your mind is a funny little thing – turns out it gets its cues from you and you can control what it thinks. If you bombard it with other things to worry about, your ex will slip into the back of your mind. When your life is full of distractions, the forgetting will happen automatically. Throw yourself into a new exercise class. Pick up a new hobby. Call up your family members that you haven't spoken to in months. Go out. Read that book you've been meaning to get to but haven't. Everyone has something they've been putting off &there's no better time to get to it than now.

• Have a good time

With the impending memories and thoughts of the past at the back of your mind, you might find it hard to actually have fun. But worry not! Just spend time with the people who make you happy or do the things you love doing. Having a great time need not be expensive, classy or full of effort. Having a food party, going on a trip to the mall, visiting museums with your friends or doing a sing-a-long could actually help you forget about the loneliness for a while.

• Be the better version of yourself

DO NOT drown yourself in alcohol, make out with anyone you don’t know, sleep on the streets, put yourself in danger, or go back to the vices you once relished. Doing these things will of no help to you. Plus, the only reason you’re probably doing this is to get your ex’s attention. Remember: it ended for a reason and your main concern at the moment is getting better. DO NOT get worse.

• Lift your head up high and move on. 

Don't let one relationship drag you down regardless of how good it seemed. There will be plenty more and it's his/her loss. Remind yourself that you are too good for them anyway – if they were good enough for you, they wouldn't have let the relationship dissipate. Tell yourself that you need someone who will treat you right and not let you go, and this person clearly wasn’t it.

• Do things on your own

Do what you want to do without being bounded to the thought that you’re not supposed to do it alone. Have faith that you on your own is just as good as it’s going to get. Spending time with someone else may be nice but that doesn’t mean the value of the moment is any less when you’re alone. Don’t be afraid of what other people are going to think. Embody independence and be happy while you’re at it.

Culled from Wikihow

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